The old year is almost up and I am making resolutions/setting goals for the new year. If you are setting new goals, first reflect on how you did with last year’s goals. Of the goals you set, how many did you accomplish? If you didn’t fully realize a goal, how close were you to reaching it?
This kind of reflection may be frustrating depending on your personality and the circumstances of last year. Perhaps your reaction is to sweep last year under the rug quickly and assert that this year will be different. But really, take a minute to reflect, even on the failure or disappointment. Of the goals you made which were not accomplished last year, did anything positive come out of setting that goal?
For example, if you made it a goal to exercise once a week, or to write a song once a month, it can be easy to focus on the weeks/months you did not follow through. However, what if you looked at it the other way? How many times did you do something positive that you wouldn’t have done if it hadn’t been for your goal? Maybe you had a goal to do something monthly. You could look with frustration on the three, or five, or eight times you “failed,” but it would be much better to look at the times you succeeded. It’s interesting that looking at failure leads to more failure. “Well, I skipped the gym last week so since my streak is broken, it doesn’t matter if I skip again this week” seems to be a common sentiment.
Perhaps instead of a goal for a streak or perfect record that can be broken, goals should be thought of as starting with a blank slate and building up. If you look at goals this way, it will be much easier to keep going even when you haven’t met your goal for last week or month. You’ll still have motivation to keep working.
I had a goal (which started in February not January) of posting to my blog every week. This is my 47th post of the year! You can do the math and count out how many weeks I missed, but 47 posts is phrased positively and I can be more proud of that. Further, it’s 12 more posts than 2021 when I didn’t have that specific goal.
I also tried the November Poem-A-Day Challenge. I wrote 15 poems of some kind (however brief or unpolished). Obviously, I missed quite a few days (half!), but I saw the resulting poems as net gain, not the days I missed as marks against my record.
I know different people handle goals and pressures different ways, but I’d encourage you to consider this perspective, especially if you’ve struggled with meeting goals in the past.
I’ll also say that I am a perfectionist. I totally get not wanting to start something you can’t finish or finishing something poorly. However, that’s all the more reason to reframe how you think about your goals.
Best wishes for the New Year! I hope you’ll have success with your goals and that you’ll be able to look back proudly on your accomplishments.
Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash
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